Here are a few things you might not be prepared for if you are going to be in France long-term and are used to US-ish culture.
Businesses are not open all the time: The further out from Paris you get, the more intense this issue will be. But even in the cities, most things are closed for lunch for 2 hours every day. Unless on Sunday, when it’s probably closed, or only open half-day if it’s a really big store. And restaurants are even more unpredictable. They can be closed at any darn time. Get in the habit of checking the hours of places, and plan ahead for having food stocked.
The French are not quick to friendship: The social structure is what some would call “traditional”, with friendships stemming from family connections, work connections, and college connections. This is more true in the country than in the cities, but still applies. Social circles are tough to break into, especially in a culture that frowns upon small talk. And also just frowns a lot in general.
In fact, smiling may get you branded a weirdo, or worse, flirty: In many parts of America, we smile. We smile to project friendliness, openness, approachfulness which is definitely a word. It is seen as polite in the US. But in France, it’s considered bonkers. Smiling AT someone on the street is not a thing. (But you do on many occasions have to say “bonjour” to them which is bizarre you try greeting someone in a friendly manner without looking happy about it, though as I write this we are currently in a plague so everyone (SHOULD BE) wearing masks over their face anyway and thus this issue is somewhat moot.)
They drive like they are rushing to the bathroom: I don’t know what they are in such a hurry for. Slow the fuck down, y’all.
And speaking of the bathroom, men piss in public a lot: Like, a lot a lot. Like I have witnessed more men whipping out their junk in broad daylight to urinate where everyone can see them in one year here in a small village in France than I did in 7 years of living in Los Angeles near many bars.
Also, poo. Poo everywhere. Dog poo, mostly: I’m told it used to be much worse. It’s still terrible. Shit everywhere o. On streets, sidewalks, in parks – no outdoor space is safe. They just refuse to pick shit up.
And sometimes they leave the whole dog: The French have a national problem with pet abandonment. People will leave their pets for just about anything. Moving. Vacation. They get bored and let it run away. It would be considered very weird to spend the amount of money and effort I did flying my cats out with me. Right now I’m dealing with a new neighbor who brought their intact (giant balls) orange and white tabby when they moved in, but they leave him out all night, he fights the other cats and is constantly wounded (and also it wakes me up in the middle of the night). People are a little better with their dogs, but not so much. Pets have a very different place in French culture.
The French have difficulty with the concept of personal space: This has been one of the worst things to deal with during plague times. Trying to get French people to stand apart is near impossible. They can barely queue, let alone not be up the asshole of the person in front of them.
And then there’s the smoking: Another thing I’m told is much better now than it used to be. It’s still a problem. So they don’t understand reasonable personal space, are constantly smoking, and…
They are afraid of moving air: They believe that drafts are how you get sick. And there are no screens in the windows of any homes, so if you want some fresh air you better enjoy it filled with bugs. They’re also always cold so imagine how well this goes when ventilation is a major factor in transmitting plague. Oh, and also…
They are hugely anti-vax: As I write this, only 40% of French people say they intend to be vaccinated against Covid-19. Vaccines were fucking invented here, and yet they’re stocking their pharmacies with essential oils.
Are you still better off in France than anywhere in the US? Most likely. This list is just things I didn’t know until I got here, and is no way meant to be a deterrant. I am much safer here in France than I ever was in the US. I just want people to know there’s a lot of poo and pee.
